Yesterday as I was working on building MORE cabinetry for the house (good god, we have a lot of cabinetry), I played a little more with the bakasana-to-handstand thing. I couldn’t seem to replicate my initial success, but I could pull my knees off my armpits and hover for a while before collapsing in exhaustion. Ladies Holiday is here, so the bandhas are very weak.
There’s an interesting discussion going on over on EZboard, and I’m trying like hell to keep my mouth shut now. I had to throw in a few responses… I had been mislabeled as a 90 lb. teeny ashtangini, which I am not. Add about 40 pounds on to that number. Later on, someone pointed out that some bloggers claim to be fine with their size, and then write about their weight or about food and eating… This, they argue, is an example of disordered eating. I disagree with that latter part.
Guilty as charged, where the first part of their argument is concerned. I write about food… I love food… but it’s a love-hate relationship. Not because I’m afraid of calories or fat, but because of the whole IBS thing, which I still don’t buy. So basically western medicine can’t figure out what’s wrong with me after dozens of tests, and then they group me in to this catch-all and try to give me prescription drugs that don’t treat my exact symptoms… If you look to your right in my side-bar, I have a whole category labeled, “My Stomach Hurts” for all these complaints of mine.
I write about feeling fat sometimes, too. This is also directly related to my “health” issues: The bloat that I live with on a day to day basis for reasons that I can’t seem to pinpoint. But some of it comes back to the influence of the media, the same ol’ standby excuse. Really, can any woman claim that they’ve never looked in a mirror and asked their friend/boyfriend/girlfriend/husband, “Do these ____ make me look fat?” So I do not apologize for any comments I’ve made here. If I call myself a cow one day, it’s probably because I ate two croissants for breakfast and my lactose intolerance is making me feel like a blimp at that moment.
We all have bad days filled with self-doubt or misconceptions. Many of us keep it to ourselves, while some of us write it down and publish it on the internet for anyone out there to read.
Oh, and I don’t feel fat today. I got me some new shoes, and they make me feel very thin and glamorous. 🙂